I'm feeling down and not in a great place so I considered bagging this post entirely. Then I saw this post and remembered that we did have a few drops of awesome. I also had lunch with a sweet woman who reminded me about Grace and how it works, about how Jesus Christ makes us whole because He never expected us to do it alone. So I'm going to wrap this up, crawl into bed and try again tomorrow.
Noticing the Needs. I leaned a powerful lesson this week. The lesson is this: God never intended for me to be able to meet all the needs of the people that rely on me each day. He never intended that any of our needs be 100% met without Him. He knew that we would be lacking and that is why His grace fills us up to the 100%. I vow this next week to not beat myself up over the needs I am not meeting and instead to do what my friend has done: to teach my children that when I am not always there to meet their need they need to turn to and rely on their Savior, Jesus Christ. He can be there for them anytime in anyplace for anything -- especially when I cannot. This doesn't mean I won't continue to look for ways to fill needs all around me all day long. It does mean that I will view needs in a new light; as an opportunity to come closer to Jesus Christ.
Understanding. I'm lacking. I am thankful to know so many people who have this figured out much more than I do. I've learned much and I need to improve.
Read. I am finding it difficult to have reading time so far this year. I've stashed a book in my van for this upcoming week hoping to make some progress. I have been reading with the children and I have come across many books I had forgotten about since Clark was a baby, books that we had outgrown a bit yet are still delightful to read. It has been fun to see Faye enjoy them, along with the rest of us.
Tune In. I'm still sick and I'm finding it difficult to master my spirits and body this week. My mind has been distracted and I'm feeling upset about something that feels rather major to me. I'm finding that being upset is draining way too much emotional energy and I need to figure out how to apply the Atonement of JEsus Christ to my aching heart to be able to move forward. For me. Why are these lessons so difficult for me to learn?
Use Time Wisely. I have been doing a good job of completing tasks when I think of them. I have realized that my morning routine needs a serious revamp and that will be happening this week.
Reach out. I am giving more hugs and spending more time tucking children in bed at night. I admit that I sometimes feel like it takes for.ev.er to tuck everyone in. Yet it really saves time because when I spend the time with each child individually they tend to stay in bed more and actually go to sleep. So who knows, maybe I'm actually getting time and energy back?
Energy. I am really struggling with this, going on 2 weeks of being sick. Not stay in bed all day sick but sick enough to zap my energy every day by noon. Further, every time I see a mirror I cringe and want to crawl back in bed and just put up a sign that says FAIL. This week will be better, right?
I did record all expenditures this week for budgeting purposes. Any improvement counts.
Drops of Awesome this week:
The oldest 3 children went skiing for their first time ever with Dad and had a great time.
I spent time with friends that I love.
Faye was mesmerized watching Emma at ballet and stood at the window watching.
I planned a birthday party for Emma (on a much smaller scale than she wants, but I did it)